Throwback Thursdays

The day my baby boy was born…

I remember it like it was yesterday. It was two days after my sister’s birthday and I was supposed to be going to breakfast with my mom and sister to celebrate her birthday. Ayden had other plans. I remember feeling cramps and thinking it was just Braxton Hicks cramps and to try to go back to sleep. At 6:50 am I just remember using the bathroom and then seeing blood. That’s when I felt like my heart stopped and I began screaming. My boyfriend jumped out of bed trying to figure out what was wrong because I was screaming and crying. I tried explaining that I saw blood and had him call my midwife while I called my mom. The midwife said to head to the hospital because I could be in labor. After several attempts I finally spoke clearly enough for my mom to understand me. I grabbed everything I could and we rushed out the door. I felt such raw fear at the thought that something could be wrong. My mind raced with so many what ifs and I had to keep forcing myself to stay calm and not cry.

When we got to the hospital I went directly to intake where they checked me to see if I was in labor or if I would be going back home. After a few checks they said I was in labor and would be admitted to the hospital. I remember asking what the blood meant and feeling relief like no other when my midwife told me that blood isn’t always a bad sign and in my case was just my body preparing for labor. The next several hours were a blur of horrible pain like I have never felt before. I had originally wanted a natural birth but that flew out the window when I realized the pain would only get worse and I was nowhere near the end. When asked if I wanted an epidural, I quickly agreed and begged for it that instant. All the research and techniques flew out the window when the pain rushed in. The epidural wasn’t as scary as I had made it out to be in my head and didn’t hurt much. It lessened the pain but with my luck it was no surprise that I still felt the contractions but luckily it didn’t last much longer. As the pain and need to push increased I asked if I was fully dilated. The midwife said I probably wasn’t but she humored me and checked. Thank goodness she did because I was ready and so was Ayden. I gave birth to Ayden at 5:32pm. 6 lbs 1 oz, 18 1/2 inches of pure perfection. The moment I saw his face everything changed. I quickly held him and vowed to protect him always. Looking back, so much has changed. He changed my priorities, my way of thinking and changed the amount of love I could feel for one person. He is my love, my life, and my joy. My baby boy.

I would love to hear your stories. Comment below about your special day! XO

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